Honeycomb

01. The Alchemist
02. Honeycomb
03. I Still Love You
04. Watching You Win
05. Viva La Vida (by Coldplay)
06. Last Drive
07. As You Are
08. Sin Verguenza
09. Two Human-Sized Wedding Candles (Poem by Rumi, translation Coleman Barks)
10. Prayer of Saint Francis
11. Losses of Her Ancestors
12. Pearl Become Powder (Poem by Rumi, translation Coleman Barks)

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01. The Alchemist
You have been fighting it with medicine
You have been fighting it by talking to a friend
You have been fighting it by not fighting it
And surrendering

Make me a ruby
Hold me up to the sun
Melt me into one
Redness
And I won’t be depressed
Now that I’m the alchemist

I’m the alchemist
I’m the alchemist
I’m the alchemist
I’m the alchemist

I have been fighting it too
With caffeine
I have been fighting it too
With my lover’s hands all over me
I look to my eccentricities
To deliver me

Make me a ruby
Hold me up to the sun
Melt me into one
Redness
And I won’t be depressed
Now that I’m the alchemist

I’m the alchemist
I’m the alchemist
I’m the alchemist
I’m the alchemist

I’m riding in a wagon laughing into the sunset
I’m laughing in a wagon riding through the darkness

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02. Honeycomb
Fleece
The color of your eyes
I couldn’t wait to see
You wrapped in teal
Piazza Navona
A gift for me
Pastel watercolors
Piano keys

I was so in love with you
While you were working on the honeycomb
Oh, oh the honeycomb
We couldn’t wait to see what the future would hold
I’d run down the driveway every day
Don’t leave the moment
Stay

At first
It was a sunny day
At Notre Dame
With Mother Mary
Watching over us

Strong knees and agile hands
Idealists making plans
Dreams of a courtyard
Family picnics
Drawings on your desk
In red brick

I was so in love with you
While you were working on the honeycomb
Oh, oh the honeycomb
We couldn’t wait to see what the future would hold
I’d run down the driveway every day
Don’t leave the moment
Stay
Don’t leave the moment
Stay

We couldn’t make it be
No matter how we tried
Not with water or sunshine
Westchester wasn’t Rome
And the honey from the honeycomb
We never remembered to bring it home
To eat

Oh I was so in love with you
While you were working on the honeycomb
I never fell out of love with you
No matter how late you came home
Oh, oh the honeycomb
I came to see that’s what the future would hold
I tired of running down the driveway
Hoping for a new day
Hoping we’d
Stay
Don’t leave the moment
Stay
Don’t leave the moment
Stay
Why can’t we stay?

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03. I Still Love You

I still love you after all this time
I still love you though you are not mine
People tell me I’ll get over it
And I know they’re wrong
But I can live with that

I still love you like a fairy tale
A sweet old story, but it isn’t real
I don’t need you to be part of it
But it’s a part of me
And I make peace with it

I can live without you
Just not without loving you
So I let you go
Even though
I’m still loving you

I’ve got no more tricks up my sleeve
How can I reach for you now that I’ve made you bleed?
I know your heart is on the mend
So the letters I write
I’ll never send

I’ve learned to live without you
Just not without loving you
So I let you go
Even though….

I carry you in my heart
Just like at the start
I love you more today than I ever did
I see you in my dreams
Almost every night
The man you were reluctant to become
Are you sharing him with someone new?

I still love you after all this time
I still love you though you are not mine
People tell me I’ll get over it
I know they’re wrong
But I can live with that

I can live without you
But I’ll never live without loving you
I let you go
Even though
I’m still loving you
I’ll be alright, still loving you

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04. Watching You Win

You came to earth on a comet
From the blazing blue
And landed like a superhero
In our school

It was like hearing Elvis sing
You’d spin a miracle from any ol’ thing
You’d knock ‘em down
As we’d gather ‘round
To see you make it look easy

I like watching you win
I like watching you win

You were a cowboy from the Wild West
Next to the ladies of the 80’s in their Limited Express
You would’ve been herding cows
Smoking a peace pipe
With the Indians
Had you been born at the same time

But you were kissing girls at the five & dime
Leading the high school team one more time
To the championship
And I admit
I could not wait to see it

I like watching you win
I like watching you win
Watching you made us believe
That anything was possible

Now you think there’s nothing to see
But you showed us who we could be
We were so afraid ‘til we saw you give it a try
You know you made us brave
You made us smile

It was like hearing Elvis sing
Like watching that bowling ball bring
The final pin down
We gathered ‘round
To see you make it look easy

I like watching you win
I like watching you win
I like watching you win
I like watching you win

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05. Viva La Vida (by Coldplay)

I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy’s eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing
“Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!”

One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can’t explain
Once you go there was never
Never an honest word
And that was when I ruled the world

It was the wicked and wild wind
Blew down the doors to let me in
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People couldn’t believe what I’d become

Revolutionaries wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field
For some reason I can’t explain
I know Saint Peter won’t call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

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06. Last Drive

I flew planes
In World War II
Over the ocean
We made loops

I saw my mother’s
Face in the sky
I was only eighteen
When she died

Won’t you take me for a drive?
Won’t you take me for a drive?
Last drive
Last drive
You take the wheel while I wave goodbye

I’ll show you the hill
Where my parents are buried
My father Jerome
My mother Nellie

The library stands where our
Grocery used to be
In the depression
My father gave out food for free

Won’t you take me for a drive?
Won’t you take me for a drive?
Last drive
Last drive
You take the wheel while I wave goodbye

There’s the river where your father used to play
The field the boys set on fire one late summer day
The hall where your grandma and I danced the night away
I hope she’s waiting for me
When I get to heaven’s gate

Won’t you take me for a drive?
Won’t you take me for a drive?
Last drive
Last drive
You take the wheel while I wave goodbye

Last drive
Last drive
You take the wheel while I wave goodbye

Last drive
Last drive
You take the wheel while I wave goodbye

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07. As You Are
I’m coming home without a suitcase
Only Santa should be carrying anything around
And the ghost of Christmas past
I’ll let him revisit all of that

I’ll see you as you are this Christmas
I’ll see you as you are right now
I’ll see you as you are this Christmas
When I come back to town

We might laugh or cry
Over stories from the past
Especially if we’re playing cards
But you’ve been to Hollywood and back
You’re not the same guy as in the mantle photograph

You had a lover in Italy for over a year
And when I saw you last
It wasn’t clear
You used to tease me in the kitchen
But I’m a pretty good cook now

I’ll see you as you are this Christmas
I’ll see you as you are right now
I’ll see you as you are this Christmas
When you come back to town

We all bring our expectations
Wondering if they’ll be met
I’ll hang mine on the coat rack by the door
Let’s hang out by the fire instead
Sit with me for a while

You say mom treats you like you’re 10 years old
Every time you go home
And that our sister gets uptight about decorating
But are you sure?
You say our brother doesn’t care about you
Because he doesn’t much talk to you
But when was he really that quiet?
Wasn’t it 1992?

Maybe he’ll see us as we are this Christmas
He’ll see us as we are right now
Maybe he’ll see us as we are this Christmas
When we come back to town

I’ll see you as you are this Christmas
I’ll see you as you are right now
I’ll see you as you are this Christmas
When I come back to town

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08. Sin Verguenza

Querida Renata
Te amo mucho porque tu vives “out loud”
Como decimos en ingles
With your married boss, you’re such a temptress
By the end of the season, he’ll love you best
You’re irresistible sin verguenza

Dearest Paloma
How I admire you
Changing careers
Late in the game
From lingerie to art dealer
And with so much going on
You haven’t even chosen
Between your live-in beau and ex-husband
But you always look good for both of them

And the smiting God
You know He never comes down to say:
“Who do you think you are Renata
Stealing the lover of another?”
No the smiting God
You know He never comes down to say:
“Who do you think you are Paloma
Dressing like that? Undressing like that?”
No the smiting God
You know he never comes down
And for that hour I don’t hear him in my head
And I can briefly live sin verguenza

I’m as sexy as mashed potatoes
Here in my sweats
I’m as threatening
As conference room carpet
I’m busy as a blanket
But I’m getting some ideas

Oh Maria Contreras
How I cried for days
After the accident at the lake
And the donation of your daughter’s heart
You took an airplane
To follow the man who got it
To be near her beating heart
A little while longer

And the smiting God
You know He never came down to say:
“Who do you think you are Maria?
You can’t change the way things are”
No the smiting God He didn’t dare to come down
Because Maria knows exactly who she is
And if He did, she’d tell him right off in Spanish
No the smiting God
You know He never comes down
And for that hour I don’t hear him in my head
And I can briefly live sin verguenza

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09. Two Human-Sized Wedding Candles (Poem by Rumi, translation Coleman Barks)

Help us to give up back-and-forth
Matter-illusion, alternating with the mind’s calibration
Of what’s good and bad, wet and dry
Anything alligator swallows becomes alligator

Two human-sized wedding candles walk toward fire
A piece of paper covered with numbers and curving color streaks
Drops in water, blurs and flows away
A message comes like honey to your heart

Help us to give up back-and-forth
Matter-illusion, alternating with the mind’s calibration
Of what’s good and bad, wet and dry
Anything alligator swallows becomes alligator

Seven friends and a dog have slept three hundred and nine days
With God’s wind turning them to rest
On one side, then on the other
There’s another way of sleeping I pray we avoid

The kind that’s running after joy
With its grief shadow behind it
Or the other, persistently trailing grief
Meeting chance elation at the corner

Help us to give up back-and-forth
Matter-illusion, alternating with the mind’s calibration
Of what’s good and bad, wet and dry
Anything alligator swallows becomes alligator

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010. Prayer of Saint Francis

Make me an instrument of your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
to be consoled as to console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

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011. Losses of Her Ancestors

She was grieving the ungrieved losses of her ancestors
Asking the names of the dead
Without knowing there were any
Her games went on, she pushed right to the edge
She was grieving the losses of her ancestors
Grieving the losses of her ancestors

Loss was acting her out
It was acting her out
It made her a house
So it could come out
Oh it hung in the air
It hung everywhere
Made her into a house
So it could come out

She was grieving the ungrieved losses of her ancestors
Asking the names of the dead
Without knowing there were any
She pressed on and went restless to her bed
She was grieving the losses of her ancestors
Grieving the losses of her ancestors

Loss was acting her out
It was acting her out
It made her a house
So it could come out
Oh it hung in the air
It hung everywhere
Made her into a house
So it could come out

She was hiding in the clothing racks
To misplace mommy
Standing by the window sill
Seeing will she stop me
Rocking on the floor
Rubbing wrists together
There was nothing in her system
It was just the weather

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012. Pearl Become Powder (Poem by Rumi, translation Coleman Barks)

Pearl become powder
Become restored eyelight
You are a treasure buried
In the ruins of the world
And there is evidence of you
Evidence of you